Paperaxle Reviews: The Change-Up

I put off watching this movie for over a week. I outgrew movies where the sole purpose of the main character is only to get laid by as many women as he can. But I had people telling me that this movie was a lot better than "Horrible Bosses", and I really liked that movie.

Christ... look at the plot. Dave Lockwood (Jason Bateman) is a successful lawyer, and is married with three children. His best friend Mitch Planko (Ryan Reynolds) is a single, unemployed actor who takes too many drugs and refuses to grow up. Both friends believe the other has the better life and would love to switch lifestyles. One night, after having way too much to drink, both men find themselves walking through a park, with an urgent need to piss and the only available spot is in a wishing fountain.

And by pissing in the wishing fountain and talking about how each other has the better life, they find themselves in each other's bodies, and living each other's lives.

Now that sounds like quality entertainment, right? Isn't this a remake of "Freaky Friday"?

This is a movie where the raunchiness dances around the rim of the toilet seat, looks deep inside, but fortunately can (for the most part) pull back before taking that plunge. It wasn't full blown "Hangover" disgusting, but it comes close. (Jesus... I never thought I'd see a baby's ass puckering up before letting out an explosive shit! And I laughed at that! Out loud! What the hell is wrong with me?) The only thing about the movie which I didn't care for, and which the movie couldn't avoid, is the consequences of best friends changing bodies and the complications of Mitch sleeping with his best friend's wife, while Dave is nearly getting laid by nearly every girl he meets. (And nearly every female in this movie has a nude scene!)

If "Horrible Bosses" is the funniest movie I've seen this year, then "The Change-Up" comes in second, and that's something that's hard for me to admit. Jason Bateman has pulled off something that Jim Carrey, Ben Stiller, and Adam Sandler can't do... that is to make two very funny movies in a row. Who woulda thunk it?

This 112 minute movie comes with a high recommendation, and I'm giving it 4 wet t-shirts and a dirty diaper. Just leave your brain in the car before you go in the theater, and you'll have a great time!

Paperaxle Reviews "Green Lantern"

As Kermit the Frog might say, "It's not easy being green". From "The Green Hornet" to "The Green Mile" to "Soylent Green", it seems like you put the word "green" into a movie title, you're asking for trouble.

Just ask Hal Jordan (Ryan Reynolds). the hero of the new movie "Green Lantern". All he wanted to do was to be the world's best test pilot, and he wound up being an intergalactic space cop.

"Green Lantern" is a very ambitious movie, and it's also a movie that tries to do too much in 114 minutes. You see, Hal is selected by the Green Lantern Corps to be the guardian of Space Sector 2814 (which includes the Milky Way galaxy) by a dying Green Lantern, who crash lands on Earth after being defeated by Parallax, whose ambition is the entire domination of the universe. Parallax feeds on fear, and since Hal Jordan is a "man without fear" (kinda like Daredevil), the ring has selected him to be the new guardian.

Parallax uses a scientist, Hector Hammond (Peter Sarsgaard) to help achieve his aims, mainly by growing Hammond's head to Elephant Man proportions and giving him the power to a) read minds, and b) to use psionic powers so he can throw things at Green Lantern. The only purpose of Hammond is to bring Parallax to Earth, and once Parallax is here, the character is no longer needed.

The movie reminded me a lot of "X-Men: First Class" in its ambition, but X-Men had three movies (four counting "Wolverine") to tell part of the backstory. "Green Lantern" tries to do everything in one movie. It would have been better to just relay the origin and training of Hal Jordan as a Green Lantern with a minor villain for him to conquer. Instead the movie has two major villains (with the set up of yet another villain), and a "save the universe while keeping his identity a secret" storyline.

The movie does have a few interesting twists. Hal isn't fooling anyone with that mask, because all his friends know who he is. He has trouble figuring out the special oath which goes with charging the ring (the Guardians of the Universe, who created the Green Lantern Corps, and responsible for supplying the lanterns to keep all 3,600 Green Lanterns with the power to supply the rings with power every 24 hours gave Hal a special oath to recite to recharge his ring)... even going as far as uttering "By the power of Grayskull!" to get the ring charged.

Blake Lively, as Carol Ferris (who runs Ferris Aircraft where Hal works as a test pilot) does not do a great job in the role. When she gets angry, you can't feel it, she's just not tough enough for the role. On the other hand, Mark Strong as Sinestro, another Green Lantern who leads the fight against Parallax with the other members of the Corps, and is also responsible for training Hal to be a Green Lantern, does a great job in the role.

I don't understand the origin of Parallax, which took all of 30 seconds to explain, nor do I understand Sinestro's need to build a yellow power ring to fight Parallax. As I understand it (reading the comic books for over 40 years), green is the color of willpower, while yellow is the color of fear. Green power rings cannot fight yellow, because of a necessary impurity in the ring. If yellow is to represent fear, building a yellow ring to fight Parallax can't work, but it doesn't matter, since the yellow ring is never used against Parallax. In a mid-end credit scene, Sinestro tries on the yellow ring, changing him to an evil super villain, with the resolution of that storyline to be in the sequel.

I wanted to like this, I did like most of it, but it's just too much. I would recommend this, and if you see it, give me the answers to the questions I'm looking for. So far, the movie is getting blasted with terrible reviews, which I don't understand. It's better than that.

Giving this one three mood rings and one bathtub ring. As the movie says "The bigger you are, the faster you'll burn", this one is a big, ambitious movie. It's gonna burn after a week, and I hope I'm wrong...